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Pinot Noir Bliss in Marriage

If the man in a marriage has a Pinot Noir buying habit, it may be prudent for him to get his wife hooked on Pinot Noir as well. As the cases of Pinot Noir accumulate in the house or garage after allocations are delivered, the wife will certainly take notice. Her ears will perk up when the UPS delivery person knows the husband by his first name. Pretty soon you may see an equal number of shoe boxes arrive by UPS from Nordstrom. She may feel the husband is spending a larger share of the household’s booty.

If you find yourself in this predicament, there are subterfuges that can be utilized. One can employ any one of a number of excuses for the wine boxes arriving at the house such as, “It’s not all my wine. I bought some for my friends who are sharing my allocation.” Or, “I bought the wine for a special wine dinner for my wine club and I will be reimbursed.” Or, “I am selling some of my wine at auction to pay for this.” Or, in desperation, “The wine was on sale.” The latter puts you on shaky ground, because although your wife can relate to this, desirable Pinot Noir is never on sale. Never, ever tell your spouse the price you paid for the Pinot Noir. Do not leave a copy of the PinotFile lying around where it can be easily perused.

Other options include having your Pinot Noir sent to your place of business although this will raise eyebrows among other employees unless you share the wine with them. More costly, but certainly advantageous, you can rent a wine locker and have your wine sent there without your spouses’ knowledge.

The best solution is to get your spouse interested in Pinot Noir. Wean her off Chardonnay. Good things happen when you drink Pinot Noir. Pour nice examples into proper stemware, and turn on some good music. Make it an event. After you have piqued her palate, she will want to move up to the “best” examples of Pinot Noir. Once she is hooked on really sumptuous Pinot Noir, there is no turning back. You will have achieved marital bliss and become a lucky man.

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